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	<title>Jill Yotz</title>
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	<link>http://www.jillyotz.com</link>
	<description>writer, collaborative partner</description>
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		<title>Dear Overstressed, Underpaid Self-Employed&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=499</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=499#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 07 Aug 2011 21:38:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Writing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=499</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[<div id="fb-root"></div>IF YOU&#8217;RE an entrepreneur bogged down by business-y stuff, then you&#8217;re in the right place&#8230; I do more than take care of the tedious aspects of running your business, I integrate everything about your business, from general admin to research, marketing, and creative strategy. Go ahead, throw  your toughest, most convoluted problems my way; and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/stress1-e1326869061618.jpg"><img class="wp-image-557 aligncenter" title="stress" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/stress1-e1326869061618.jpg" alt="" width="250" height="246" /></a></div>
<p>IF YOU&#8217;RE an entrepreneur bogged down by business-y stuff, then you&#8217;re in the right place&#8230;</p>
<p>I do more than take care of the tedious aspects of running your business, I <em>integrate</em> everything about your business, from general admin to research, marketing, and creative strategy. Go ahead, throw  your toughest, most convoluted problems my way; and if I can&#8217;t take them, rest assured that I know someone reputable and totally cool who can.</p>
<p><em>Finally, you can focus on your real work, the whole reason you started this little project in the first place. </em></p>
<p><em> </em>So what are you going to do now with all this money and free time?</p>
<p>Glad to be of service,</p>
<p><em>~ jill</em></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;
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		<title>Small Biz Showcase: Dolls By Sue</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=492</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=492#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 31 Jan 2011 16:21:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Art]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Creativity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Design]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=492</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Over the river and through the woods&#8230;. I enter a room scattered with severed body parts; This is not the lair of the next &#8220;Green River Killer&#8221;, but the studio of an extraordinary artist and doll maker: Sue Yotz. I spent the afternoon with Sue in her self-designed two story home on the Middle Fork [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/P1020587-e1326868664215.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-509" title="Clay Body Parts" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/P1020587-e1329618206852.jpg" alt="" width="583" height="387" /></a></p>
<h3><strong>Over the river and through the woods&#8230;.</strong></h3>
<p>I enter a room scattered with severed body parts;</p>
<p>This is not the lair of the next &#8220;Green River Killer&#8221;, but the studio of an extraordinary artist and doll maker: Sue Yotz.</p>
<p><a name="more"></a><br />
I spent the afternoon with Sue in her self-designed two story home on the Middle Fork of the Snoqualmie River. Time passes swiftly with her, whose sense of humor and intelligence paints a story in your mind as easily as she sculpts the knobby knees of her dolls.</p>
<p>Her stories are equally rife with artistic observations, her children and grandchildren, and politics. When asked, she admits that &#8220;success&#8221;, to her, is a concept to strive for that constantly evolves and is never achieved. Yet it is hard to believe that this women<em> hasn&#8217;t</em> achieved success as I bask in the joyful sounds of the river and her laughter.</p>
<p>This laughter is evident in the dolls she creates.</p>
<p>To be clear, she does not create barbie dolls or toys for children. Her creations are sculpted stories frozen in time;<span style="font-size: medium;"> like that one photograph of you in mid-conversation with your mouth agape and honesty in your eyes. </span> These stories are reflected in the titles of her work.</p>
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<p>It is clear that Sue approaches her work with a sense of humor and problem solving: how to make a hand, how to make the body structurally sound, how to accurately portray the hood of a cobra. As committed as she is to discipline (she works every day until 1pm), she also recognizes a need to &#8220;play and be silly&#8221;. She brings a graciousness and humanity to her work through a balance of skill and discipline, playfulness and imagination.</p>
<h3><strong>How It All Began</strong></h3>
<p>&#8220;The word that is the most important is &#8220;time&#8221;. Time to do the work, time to build up the skills &#8211; years and years and years.&#8221;</p>
<p>Doll-making has been her focus for over twenty years, after her sister, Billee, told her: &#8220;You can do this, you should try it.&#8221; She worked all night on her first project, a dragon, and called Billee the next day with her victory.</p>
<p>Sue has created art all her life: <em>&#8220;Children naturally draw, I just never stopped.&#8221; </em><strong></strong>Around the age of seven, she became captivated by The Bridge In Monet&#8217;s Garden and also discovered how to draw roses. She sketched her own renditions of this painting dozens of times, many of which were sent her her father overseas during World War II.</p>
<p>Although she eventually took some art classes, Sue maintains that she never actually learned in an art class, with the exception of learning how to make hands. &#8220;You keep getting better and better as you keep solving problems. It doesn&#8217;t happen overnight.&#8221; It is evident in viewing her work that each doll is the culmination of a lifetime of interests: <strong>&#8220;Architecture, art history, painting&#8230; all of it comes into doll making.&#8221;</strong></p>
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<h3><strong>Details Are &#8220;Filtered IN&#8221; Instead Of Filtered Out</strong></h3>
<p>With a lifetime of observation and appreciation, Sue perceives details that many people pass by unaware:</p>
<p>&#8220;You notice, for example, how the light falls or how some aspects seem dull or metallic, because you never know when you&#8217;re going to need to paint it. You notice more details, textures&#8230;&#8221;</p>
<p>Her perceptions filter into our conversation with organic ease. I am no longer sitting on her deck beside her but transported into the original art gallery of nature: the bright winter moss poking out between stepping stones and the manner in which a particular deck board is rotting suddenly become complete and utterly fascinating worlds.</p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/P1020582.jpg"><img class="wp-image-507 alignnone" title="P1020582" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/P1020582-1024x680.jpg" alt="" width="583" height="386" /></a></div>
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<h3><strong>The Artist As</strong><strong> Entrepreneur</strong></h3>
<p>&#8220;We are in a new world. Being able to express yourself and have yourself listened to is showing up in so many ways.&#8221;</p>
<p>From her beautifully designed surroundings to her vast array of knowledge, Sue demonstrates how an artist is very much an entrepreneur. Like an entrepreneur, the artist evolves through many mediums and forms of expression, and the culmination of experience makes each new endeavor as unique and refined as the artist herself.</p>
<p>&#8220;Most people I know who are artists have done a lot- it&#8217;s a lifetime study.&#8221;<br />
There is no &#8220;turning off&#8221; the inquisitive observations and deep appreciation for the opportunities that an artist has to explore the world around her.<br />
Then comes the inevitable question about her relationship with money, finance and how to make a living.</p>
<p>There is hesitation for the first time in the conversation, while she gathers herself to address a topic she would just as soon leave alone. Her view on money is to address bills and financial obligations immediately so that they don&#8217;t become an all-consuming worry. This tactic allows her to stay focused on her work.</p>
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<p>She ruefully admits that her ideal client at this point is &#8220;anyone who can pay&#8221;. Sue struggles with a dilemma that I notice in many women artists and entrepreneurs: promoting her work&#8217;s value.</p>
<p>She has joyfully given away her work to family and friends, but she does not actively advertise outside of local art shows, and she does not have a website. She is clear about the price for her work but has not yet bridged the gap between defining it and promoting it. Don&#8217;t expect to pay a couple hundred dollars for these exquisite one-of-a-kind dolls. In the eye of a professional (or even an appreciator such as myself), there is no doubt that these painstakingly hand-sculpted, hand-painted, and hand-sewn pieces are worth hundreds to thousands of dollars each.</p>
<h3><strong>&#8220;A Lot Of Making A Doll Is <span style="text-decoration: underline;">Thinking</span> About It&#8221;</strong></h3>
<p>&#8220;Many who know Sue will attest that a conversation with her is rarely as direct and succinct as planned. I asked only a few questions during my afternoon with her and yet we seamlessly transitioned from discussing artists, to family, to nature, to politics. The afternoon rapidly became evening, and I made to leave. Yet standing in the foyer with my notepad packed and shoes tied, we still had more to say.</p>
<p>Do not expect to be given a road map when entering into a conversation with this well-read, opinionated and fascinating woman; relax and enjoy where the road takes you.</p>
<p>&#8220;Really, it all comes down to the fact,&#8221; she jokes with a mischievous twinkle in her gray-blue eyes,  &#8220;I love the smell of turpentine.&#8221;</p>
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<div style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-style: italic;">For More Information:</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;"><em><a href="mailto:sueyotz@gmail.com">Contact Sue Yotz</a> </em></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;"><em>View her work at:</em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.trainmuseum.org/rrd/rrdmain.asp"><em>Railroad Days at Snoqualmie</em></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.festivalatmtsi.org/"><em>The Festival at Mount Si</em><em> </em></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;"><em>Art In The Valley </em></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;"><em>Available By Appointment</em></div>
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		<title>Why Being &quot;Picky&quot; Isn&#8217;t All Bad</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=491</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=491#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 29 Jan 2011 22:55:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Writing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=491</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[DISCUSSION POINT: The Power of Vision &#8211; Achieving Your Goals, Starting Your Dream Business, And Creating Your Very Own Masterpiece.  I have a problem. My mom used to define this problem as being &#8220;too picky&#8221;. This applied to my choices in guys, clothes, purchases, etc. The truth is that I have a picture in my mind of exactly what I want, and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><div style="text-align: left;"><img class="size-full wp-image-625 aligncenter" title="picky-eaters" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/picky-eaters.jpg" alt="" width="293" height="293" /></div>
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<div style="text-align: left;">DISCUSSION POINT:</div>
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<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;">The Power of Vision &#8211; </span><em><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">Achieving Your Goals, Starting Your Dream Business, And Creating Your Very Own Masterpiece. </span></span></em></div>
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<p>I have a problem.</p>
<p>My mom used to define this problem as being &#8220;too picky&#8221;. This applied to my choices in guys, clothes, purchases, etc.</p>
<p>The truth is that I have a picture in my mind of exactly what I want, and it seems impossible (in the &#8220;real&#8221; world, I mean) to conjure it myself.</p>
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<h3><a name="more"></a><strong>1) IT DOES EXIST</strong></h3>
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<p>My mom&#8217;s blanket declaration of my &#8220;pickiness&#8221; problem and how I couldn&#8217;t settle just made my younger self more secure than ever in the knowledge that whatever it was I had pictured in my mind really DID exist.</p>
<p>Somewhere.</p>
<p>And it did- IT DOES- exist! I just have to show a little (and sometimes A LOT) of patience.</p>
<h3><strong>2) IT&#8217;S OKAY TO BE PICKY:</strong></h3>
<p>Being picky doesn&#8217;t have to be a negative trait; as much agony as it may cause for me when I can&#8217;t find what I&#8217;m looking for, I&#8217;m happier after the wait than if I had settled for something I intuitively knew was wrong for me.</p>
<p>This works the same way for business, too. Shaboom, Inc. writes about the importance for a small business to be picky when attracting clients, <em>especially</em> in this down economy. <a href="http://www.shaboominc.com/blog/archives/in_praise_of_small_ponds_why_being_picky_is_good_for_business.html">In Praise of Small Ponds: Why Being Picky Is Good for Business</a> summarizes the traps that small business fall into when trying to attract a clientele:<em> </em></p>
<div style="color: black; font-family: Georgia,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><em>In any economic situation, the quickest way for a tiny business to fail is to: </em></span></div>
<p>1. Be as general as you can to attract the widest possible range of potential clients and customers.<br />
2. Take care not to turn anyone off; tone down your personality.<br />
3. Be careful not to scare people away by talking about price.<br />
4. When you do discuss price, quote the lowest price possible.</p>
<div style="color: black; font-family: Georgia,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><em><br />
This approach ensures that your tiny business will get lost in a very big pond. </em></span></div>
<div style="color: black; font-family: Georgia,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><em><br />
And, for small fish, the key to success is to make the pond smaller, not bigger.</em></span></div>
<p><strong> </strong><strong></strong><br />
Just like I found the love of my life after living most of my (albeit, young) life with only the silent conviction that he existed somewhere in the world, I also found many smaller day-to-day items whose details make me supremely satisfied.<strong> </strong></p>
<p><a href="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/picky-627x395-e1329618971228.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-624" title="picky-627x395" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/picky-627x395-e1329618971228.jpg" alt="" width="583" height="367" /></a></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3><strong>3) BEING PICKY WORKS:</strong></h3>
<p>The lesson here is that being picky is not a bad quality if what you are really doing is pursuing a vision. It is imperative that you <span style="font-size: medium;">never underestimate the power of vision and the impact of emotion.</span></p>
<p><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">If you dream it- and believe it!- it will come.</span></span></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3><strong>4) ANECDOTAL EVIDENCE:</strong></h3>
<p>I provide an example at the bottom of this post: a copy of my email sent over a year ago to countless breeders, adoption agencies, and pet shelters during my search for a Bengal pet cat. To describe the email as &#8220;thorough&#8221; is probably an understatement, but it is a perfect example of <span style="font-size: medium;">being clear about what you want.</span></p>
<p>Furthermore, because I clearly stated my vision, I found EXACTLY what I was looking for.</p>
<p>Although, I have countless personal anecdotes of using vision to achieve success, my email in search of the perfect bengal cat is a <em>documented </em>example of this achievement. I am still amazed that it manifested so rapidly and precisely!</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3><strong>5) AN EXAMPLE:</strong></h3>
<p><em style="font-family: 'Courier New',Courier,monospace;"><br />
</em><em>Hello,</em></p>
<p><em>I am interested in adopting a Bengal cat. In perusing your website, I could not find what cats you had available for adoption. If you have a Bengal, or a suggestion of another breed, please let me know; I live in Seattle.</em></p>
<p><em>While I adore kittens in general, my boyfriend and I are looking for a cat who is a bit more mature, and I love that Bengals are a social and personable breed! Furthermore, we would prefer to adopt a rescued animal rather than purchase from a breeder; there are too many cats in shelters who need a loving home. </em></p>
<p><em>My boyfriend and I have been considering getting a cat for some time now. I heard about bengals from a friend who is &#8220;cat sitting&#8221; one for an extended period of time, and then in researching cat breeds to find an animal who would be a good fit for us. I am attracted to bengals because of their intelligence, mainly. I grew up with pets and, every once in a while, an animal would come along who was clearly more intelligent- and more like a friend/family member than a pet- than the average cat, parakeet, etc. (Yes, I had a parakeet who would go on bikerides and climb trees with me when I was a kid). =)</em></p>
<p><em>The fact that Bengals are BRED, in part, for their intelligence means that the traits that I enjoy in my pet doesn&#8217;t have to be a &#8220;crapshoot&#8221; afterall. So after further research, I&#8217;ve fallen in love with the breed. I only hope that I would be a good fit for one of them!</em></p>
<p><em>Here is a little more about us:</em></p>
<p><em>Our names are Jill and Trevor. We&#8217;ve been together for over two years, and we&#8217;ve known each other for longer; any cat entering the picture will be coming into an already-stable relationship of two very loving people.</em></p>
<p><em>We are both loving animal people, and have grown up with cats. When we stay at friends&#8217; and families&#8217; homes, the cats typically sleep with us. There are a few reasons why we haven&#8217;t yet made the final ownership step:</em></p>
<p><em>- We are both working, &#8220;young professionals&#8221; (a forensic accountant and a musician), and would prefer a mature cat; we are interested in a pet who is already house broken, &#8220;fixed&#8221;, and socialized. We also have a balcony, and I feel confident that an adult cat will behave more responsibly on it than a kitten. The balcony is 6 stories up, by the way.</em></p>
<p><em>- We are concerned about getting an untreatable, physically and/or emotionally unhealthy adult cat, or a cat with a set-in-its-ways, displeasing personality.</em></p>
<p><em>- The start-up costs (spaying/neutering, vaccines, etc), although we are fully prepared for the &#8220;maintenance&#8221; costs, and adoption fees.</em></p>
<p><em>We are fairly laid-back and tidy people, and I&#8217;d say that Trevor is the calmer of the two of us. While Trevor is perhaps more interested in cuddling and lounging with a cat, I am gung-ho about going on &#8220;adventures&#8221; with one (I had a fantastic domestic short hair that enjoyed adventures when I was in high school). My work hours are regular 8-5, M-F, and Trevor&#8217;s hours are noon-8, MWThF, so a cat will have a lot of company, despite our busy work lives. We have friends who are excellent pet-sitters when we&#8217;re out of town. We also have a spacious roof-top deck that a harnessed cat would enjoy visiting (there is, however, a doggy pee-patch there, as well). On the whole, we are looking for a furry little personality to cuddle and pad around the apartment with us. As we live in a somewhat urban environment, I wouldn&#8217;t mind finding one who is harness trained, as well.</em></p>
<p><em>Please let me know if any cats come your way that would be suitable as per my [rather lengthy] email.</em></p>
<p><em>Thank you.</em></p>
<p>&nbsp;
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		<title>The User Experience Online and Off</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=489</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=489#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 26 Jan 2011 04:45:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=489</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[8 Principles Presented By Feedburner&#8217;s Co-Founder,  and my own take on how they apply to off-line networking. Matt Shobe, co-founder of Feedburner (now apart of Google), gave a presentation in Seattle last night on UX design at the tech startup accelerator, the Founder Institute. He explained that user design and experience is about how people [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><div style="text-align: left;"><img class="wp-image-628 alignnone" title="73" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/73.png" alt="" width="412" height="299" /></div>
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<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">8 Principles Presented By Feedburner&#8217;s Co-Founder, </span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><em><span style="font-size: small;">and my own take on how they apply to off-line networking.</span></em></div>
<p style="text-align: left;">Matt Shobe, co-founder of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FeedBurner">Feedburner</a> (now apart of Google), gave a presentation in Seattle last night on UX design at the tech startup accelerator, the Founder Institute. He explained that user design and experience is about how people perceive you (and your company), and he provided 8 Principles to creating positive user experiences.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a name="more"></a></p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I am writing about them today because I was struck by their potential for other uses. It may require stretching the imagination for a few (take #1, for example: fast is not always better), but these principles are applicable for professional, in-person networking, as well as in the online community.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">In short, it&#8217;s a good chunk of general advice (presented by Matt Shobe, 01/24/2011):<strong> </strong></p>
<h3>1. Be Fast</h3>
<p>As fast a technical experience as possible and no unnecessary roadblocks.</p>
<p>In other situations, it may be a good idea to be direct, straightforward, and/or to not waste other people&#8217;s time.</p>
<h3>2. Be Yourself</h3>
<p>Allow your personality &amp; style to reflect in the experience.</p>
<p>In person, this shows authenticity and also leaves a unique impression on the people you meet. This will not only keep you memorable and honest to others, but it will help you identify people who you do and don&#8217;t want to work with.</p>
<h3>3. Engage In Conversations</h3>
<p>Your user&#8217;s experience will increase tremendously if you go out and say &#8220;hey, I heard you and am working on it&#8221;., and if you have the humility to say &#8220;we screwed up and it won&#8217;t happen again&#8221;, you&#8217;re winning yourself a 2nd or even a 3rd chance.</p>
<p>My own experience tells me that if you don&#8217;t bring it up- at a party, at a networking event, etc- nobody will no about &#8220;it&#8221; or you. You MUST start- and engage in- the conversation in order to get what you want. Engaging others in a conversation also helps them know where you&#8217;re coming from- which is less stressful than trying to guess.</p>
<h3 style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">4. Be Willing to Give Up Control</h3>
<p>Meaning, unless you&#8217;re product is photography, save your time and energy and just use iStockPhoto. You don&#8217;t have to do it all from scratch.</p>
<p>Similar to Matt&#8217;s explanation, you don&#8217;t have to do everything yourself. It is okay to seek help. John Assaraf and Murray Smith, authors of <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Answer-Business-Achieve-Financial-Extraordinary/dp/B002PJ4IQQ?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;link_code=btl&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969" target="_blank">The Answer</a><img style="border: medium none ! important; margin: 0px ! important; padding: 0px ! important;" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;l=btl&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969&amp;o=1&amp;a=B002PJ4IQQ" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" />, suggest that you &#8220;find people who <strong>play</strong> at those things that for you are <strong>work</strong>&#8220;.</p>
<p>Plus, you&#8217;ll be happier and more fun to be around if you&#8217;re willing to give up some control.</p>
<h3>5. Be Polite</h3>
<p>This refers not only to you as a person, but your product. Put yourself in the user&#8217;s shoes: how would you like the product to address you?</p>
<p>Use this principle if you don&#8217;t want to leave a bad impression with people after doing anything that involves other people. Period.</p>
<h3 style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">6. Prepare for Failure</h3>
<p style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">&#8230;On your user&#8217;s part. Users will come up with ways you never thought of to use- or screw up- your product.</p>
<p>Prepare for events to unfold unexpectedly, despite your careful planning and coordinating. I&#8217;m confident there are other uses to this principle and networking&#8230;</p>
<div style="text-align: left;">What are YOUR ideas?</div>
<h3 style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">7. Be Reliable</h3>
<p>Example: nobody will use the online product if it crashes often &amp; without warning.</p>
<p>Reliability translates to &#8220;trust capital&#8221;. If people can&#8217;t rely on you to be somewhere at a certain time, or to provide top-notch work regardless of your personal life, then they&#8217;ll find somebody else.</p>
<h3 style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">8. Be Surprising</h3>
<p style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Provide good surprises that will delight your users.</p>
<p>This eighth principle is what started me on this blog in the first place. How can somebody be surprising? A &#8220;surprise&#8221; means that  the action or thing wasn&#8217;t predictable. Thus an idea for a great exercise in expanding one&#8217;s comfort zones:</p>
<p>Ask, &#8220;How can I be surprising?&#8221;</p>
<p>I actually managed to intimidate myself with the vastness of the question. So I clarified:</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">&#8220;How can I be surprising today?&#8221;</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I ask myself this question as a challenge to push myself beyond what is is comfortable and normal.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">In networking, I challenge myself to approach someone who I was intimidated to approach in the past, to ask for something that I was to afraid to ask for before, or to create original business cards whose colors and shapes stand out among the many collected during an event.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">I surprised myself when I started this blog and realized that I love to write.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">These are only a few examples in the context of networking, and I would like to hear your own thoughts beyond this:</p>
<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">How can you be surprising today?</span></div>
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		<title>Small Biz Showcase: Trevor Larkin Music</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=487</link>
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		<pubDate>Sun, 23 Jan 2011 06:59:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Art]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[10, or 9 TRAITS THAT REAL MUSICIANS (&#38; ENTREPRENEURS) SHOULD HAVE: &#160; In the midst of teaching, performing, session work, and finalizing his latest EP, this magna cum laude graduate from Berklee College of Music paused the chaos to discuss his freelance lifestyle, the music industry, and how he keeps his music honest.   Trevor [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><div style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><a href="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Smoking-Guitar-e1326869351495.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-533" title="Smoking Guitar" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/Smoking-Guitar-e1329620734463.jpg" alt="" width="583" height="387" /></a></div>
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<div style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><em><span style="text-decoration: line-through;">10</span>, or 9 TRAITS THAT REAL MUSICIANS (&amp; ENTREPRENEURS) SHOULD HAVE:</em></span></div>
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<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span style="font-size: small;"><em>In the midst of teaching, performing, session work, and finalizing his latest EP, this magna cum laude graduate from Berklee College of Music paused the chaos to discuss his freelance lifestyle, the music industry, and how he keeps his music honest.</em></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><em> </em></span></p>
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<p><a href="www.trevorlarkin.com">Trevor Larkin</a> has made the conscious decision to keep positive-thinking on his side and pursue his passions in an intellectual methodology that informs and inspires entrepreneurs in every field. After spending just a few minutes with Mr. Larkin, it becomes obvious that his experiences transcend the music community, and his explanations in this interview have universal applications to the music and business worlds alike.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Ten discoveries about Trevor Larkin, and <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">ten</span> nine values that real musicians and entrepreneurs should have:</strong></span></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<h3><em>1) HIS NAME APPEARS IN PORN PRODUCTIONS  </em><em>(maybe this isn&#8217;t one of those values):</em><strong><em> </em></strong></h3>
<p><strong>JY:</strong> Tell us about yourself. What nifty tidbit <span style="text-decoration: underline;">can’t</span> we find if we Google your bio?<br />
<strong><br />
TL: </strong>If you Google my name, you might find a profile on IMDB for a Trevor Larkin, nicknamed “the Kid,” who worked on several small movies as a key grip. You may also discover that Trevor Larkin is the name of a porn producer. I’m neither one of these guys.</p>
<h3><em>2) HE&#8217;S WILLING TO GET HIS HANDS DIRTY:</em></h3>
<p><strong>JY: </strong>We know you’re a musician, but what sort of things do you do?</p>
<p><strong>TL: </strong>Honestly, pretty much everything I do involves music. I’m very lucky that my job is my passion. I have to balance all of the day-to-day logistical obligations any entrepreneur and small business owner has to contend with, along with making sure my creative commitments are honored. I’m in three bands, not including my own material, so practicing and writing takes up a huge chunk of my day. Then factor in business admin, preparing online content, teaching, numerous sessions and side gigs…the list goes on and on. It doesn’t leave much time for watching Simpson&#8217;s re-runs! But I wouldn’t have it any other way. Being your own boss and doing something you love for a living is a unique privilege. And besides, if I had a day gig, I’d be doing all this music stuff in my spare time, any way!<em> </em></p>
<h3><em>3) HE KEEPS HIS STYLE CONGRUENT WITH HIS VALUES:</em></h3>
<p>JY: How do you describe your music to other people?</p>
<p>TL: Lyrically, it’s empathic, a little dry and sarcastic, confident but with a hint of melancholy. Musically, the melody is king, and it’s supported by simple chord changes. I guess I’d say my music is <strong>honest, beautiful, simple and unpretentious.<em> </em></strong></p>
<h3><em>4) HE&#8217;S NOT AFRAID TO TAKE IT ALL OFF:</em></h3>
<p>JY: What image do you think your music conveys?</p>
<p>TL: I’d say that my music portrays my personality pretty accurately, and I think that’s what makes it special. In today’s music world, there’s a lot of homogenous nonsense cluttering up the airwaves as people make an effort to cash in on flash-in-the-pan trends. The music business is changing rapidly, and artists are scared to make a stand with their own vision when somebody else is already making money. That’s not what I want. <span style="font-size: large;">When people listen to my music, they’re getting- for better or worse- an experience that’s uniquely me.</span> I can’t write music any other way. That’s either going to see me through to great things or sabotage my career beyond repair! I hope that the image my music conveys is similar to how I’d describe my tunes- honest, beautiful, simple and unpretentious.<em> </em></p>
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<h3><em>5) HE DIVERSIFIES</em>:</h3>
<p><strong>JY:</strong> What are you working on currently?</p>
<p><strong>TL: </strong>I’ve got a new EP in works that I’m extremely excited about. It’s the best music I’ve written yet. I’m all done tracking and should be done mixing and mastering in a few weeks.</p>
<p><strong>JY: </strong>Thoughts about the direction you want your work to go? Long term career goals?</p>
<p><strong>TL: </strong>Specifically, I’d love to become a full-time recording artist- making records and touring the world. More generally, I’d like to see my career centered around songwriting. I enjoy working with other creative people and could easily see myself writing and producing material for other artists.<em> </em></p>
<h3><em>6) HE SCHEDULES CREATIVITY INTO HIS DAY:</em></h3>
<p><strong>JY: </strong>Can you briefly describe your music-making process?</p>
<p><strong>TL: </strong>I tend to write music in bits and pieces. I write everyday, but rarely will write an entire song in one sitting. I’ll usually pick my guitar, start playing through some simple chords or riffs and just let my mind wander. I’ll start humming along or singing random words, and a melody will start taking shape. Lyrically, I like to start with a title. It’d be difficult, for example, to write a book without first knowing the plot. I don’t know any author who just sits down at their computer and wings it. A great title immediately shapes a song’s narrative. It makes you think, “well, how can I bring this idea to life?” Your imagination has something to grab onto.<em> </em></p>
<h3><em>7) HE IS TIDY:</em><strong> </strong></h3>
<p><strong>JY: </strong>How do you balance your music with other obligations?<strong> </strong></p>
<p><strong>TL: </strong>I know a lot of artists who feel staying on top of mundane, day-to-day life is somehow inauthentic. I’ve never had that problem. For me, it all ultimately serves the music. If I’m stressed out about money- have piles of unpaid bills, the landlord breathing down my neck and an empty fridge- there’s no way I’m going to be able to concentrate on my songwriting.<span style="font-size: large;"> I tend to be pretty fastidious about organization and time management- I know that if I’m distracted, or feel like I’m bullshitting myself, people will hear that in my music. </span> There’s always a lot to do in a day- at times trying to fit everything in can be overwhelming- but I make it work.<em> </em></p>
<h3><em> <img src='http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_cool.gif' alt='8)' class='wp-smiley' /> HE STAYS INFORMED:</em></h3>
<p><strong>JY: </strong>When I’ve talked to other musicians, they seem to be pretty jaded about record labels, getting signed, and living the dream of a famous rock star. What is your perspective on the evolution of the music industry?</p>
<p><strong>TL: </strong>Well, that’s the million-dollar question. It used to be that the labels controlled all outlets for recorded music- record sales, radio, music videos, etc. These days, anyone can check out whatever artist they want to on YouTube for free, buy directly from independent musicians through any number of DIY services and, of course, download music (hopefully, but not usually, legally). The old business model relied on music being scarce, which it clearly isn’t anymore. Record labels obviously can’t survive anymore on record sales alone. I think it’s going to take all the bigwigs from the music, TV, movie, and video game businesses- along with tech companies and internet service providers- sitting down and figuring out some way of integrating their businesses and sharing profits. From an independent artist’s perspective, though, it’s counterproductive loosing too much sleep over the state of the business. The music business is really only as good as the songs and characters driving it- whatever the business is going to become, it’s going to need genuine, passionate music fueling the evolution. I think <span style="font-size: large;">the most important outcome from all this upheaval will be the realization that people are more then happy to pay for great art, but not so happy paying for bullshit.</span><em> </em></p>
<h3><em>9) HE IS COMMITTED: </em><strong> </strong></h3>
<p>JY: What suggestions would you give to someone who is interested in music and wants to do it professionally?</p>
<p><strong>TL:</strong> I’d probably just tell them to commit. If you’re thinking you might want to go to grad school, or maybe dabble in golf or some other hobby, then don’t bother pursuing music professionally. In order to realistically get a foot in the door and establish a career, as with any start-up business, you have to dedicate every waking hour towards cultivating your craft. There’s too much to do and stay on top of, and <span style="font-size: large;">if you approach music with the same dedication you would an eight-to-five job you’re not going to see any progress.<em> </em></span></p>
<h3><span style="font-size: small;"><em>10) HE IS SELF-AWARE:</em></span></h3>
<p><strong>JY: </strong>How do you define the word “success”?</p>
<p><strong>TL: </strong>I like the Stephen King line- if you’re getting paid for your writing, and you’re using that money to pay the electricity bill, then you’re successful. Ultimately, it’s about staying in the game and keeping your head on straight. For me, I define success as continued progress. <span style="font-size: large;">If I’m not working with the most talented professionals possible, or writing the most compelling music I can, then I’m doing something wrong.</span> If I can keep those two things going, then whatever happens is going to be authentic to my art, which I hope is a good thing! Having a productive attitude is a huge component to success as well. Not surprisingly, I can’t think of a single jaded and cynical musician who’s proud of their art or has anything good to say about anyone else. Sacrificing faith in good people and dismissing talent is profoundly sad to see.</p>
<p><strong>JY: </strong>What would you like to get from today’s interview?</p>
<p><strong>TL:</strong>I’m always excited to talk with enthusiastic and positive music fans, people with informed but unpretentious musical tastes. I hope people will read this interview, find it interesting, check out a tune or two and get hooked!</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><em>You can find out more about Trevor Larkin on his website: www.trevorlarkin.com.</em></p>
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		<title>How to Build a Cat Exercise Wheel, Part 1</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=486</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=486#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 20 Jan 2011 04:40:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[blog]]></category>
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		<description><![CDATA[RESEARCH &#38; REVIEW Bengal cats are renowned for their energetic antics. You bought cat climbing trees, cat condos, cat toys; you tried scratching posts, catnip and cat calming aids, but for those who live with such a feline, you may want to consider buying a exercise wheel.  Yes, I said exercise wheel. Like the one&#8217;s [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/uschiwheel1-e1326869408594.jpg"><img class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-542" title="uschiwheel1" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/uschiwheel1-e1326869408594.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="262" /></a></span></p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"> RESEARCH &amp; REVIEW</span></p>
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<p style="text-align: left;">Bengal cats are renowned for their energetic antics. You bought cat climbing trees, cat condos, cat toys; you tried scratching posts, catnip and cat calming aids, but for those who live with such a feline, you may want to consider buying a exercise wheel.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><a name="more"></a> Yes, I said exercise wheel.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Like the one&#8217;s for hamsters. Except <em>gigantic</em>.</p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><object width="320" height="266" classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=6,0,40,0"><param name="src" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/FDwZfhdkA3M&amp;fs=1&amp;source=uds" /><embed width="320" height="266" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/FDwZfhdkA3M&amp;fs=1&amp;source=uds" /></object></div>
<p style="text-align: left;">It turns out that many cats enjoy launching themselves into an all out run from time to time. More surprisingly, they are pretty amenable to using the cat wheel. Cat toys and kitty condos provide great distractions, but there&#8217;s nothing else that really exhausts- and satisfies!- a cat like pretending to chase a gazelle at full speed across the Savannah.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;">I researched </span><span style="font-size: large;">where to find</span>, and eventually, <span style="font-size: large;">how to build</span> a cat exercise wheel. Initial research proved unsuccessful; although there are other cat wheels available in the ether, it&#8217;s slim- and expensive!- pickings. I haven&#8217;t found any yet that fulfill my 3 criteria:</p>
<div style="font-family: inherit; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;">1) <span style="text-decoration: underline;">Serviceable</span> &#8211; e.g. diameter, width of platform, ease of turning, and <em>safe for cat</em>! </span><br />
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</span></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;">2) <span style="text-decoration: underline;">Inexpensive</span> &#8211; $200 or less</span><br />
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</span></div>
<div style="font-family: inherit; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;">3) <span style="text-decoration: underline;">Attractive</span> &#8211; after all, it WILL be an enormous fixture in my living room</span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<p style="text-align: left;">My research included reading many forums involving my same question: where can I find one? how can I build one? So here is a compiled list of  several resources for cat exercise wheels:</p>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>SOURCES TO BUY A CAT WHEEL:</li>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://bengalized.com/catwheels/catwheels.html">Bengalized (Roger Hayes)</a> &#8211; $850</li>
<ul>
<li>Price: bad</li>
<li>Size: perfect</li>
<li>Appearance: nice- an industrial work of art</li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left; padding-left: 90px;"><a style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TTfKvvR1CnI/AAAAAAAAAzk/Z33-5kRUyoc/s1600/tanduwheel.jpg"><img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TTfKvvR1CnI/AAAAAAAAAzk/Z33-5kRUyoc/s200/tanduwheel.jpg" alt="" width="200" height="168" border="0" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.petzones.com/Cat_Exercise_wheel.html">Petzones</a> &#8211; $849</li>
<ul>
<li>Price: bad  -  <span style="font-size: x-small;">$<em>649 for the 36&#8243; diameter wheel, but it could be argued that 36&#8243; is too short for an adult cat to fully stretch out</em>. </span></li>
<li>Size: too large</li>
<li>Appearance: a wooden work of art!</li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
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<p style="text-align: left;"><a href="http://www.catwheelcompany.com/home.cfm"><img style="border: medium none ! important; margin: 0px ! important; padding: 0px ! important;" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;l=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969&amp;o=1&amp;a=B002X3YVCU" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" /></a></p>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<ul>
<li> <a href="http://www.catwheelcompany.com/home.cfm">Cat Wheel Company</a> -  $295.00</li>
<ul>
<li>Price: okay<em>  <span style="font-size: x-small;">-  Amazon.com reports it as $795.00, so I&#8217;m not sure if the company&#8217;s website is up to date.</span></em>Size: perfect<em>  </em><span style="font-size: x-small;"><em>-  Tread is wide enough &amp; 41&#8243; in diameter is large enough for an adult without taking up TOO much space, relatively.</em></span></li>
<li>Appearance: bad  <span style="font-size: x-small;"><em>-  Plastic and cheap-looking; I mean, it is decorated with stickers that look like fire!</em></span></li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<div style="text-align: left; padding-left: 120px;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><em><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Toy-Go-Round-Wheel-Treadmill/dp/B002X3YVCU?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;link_code=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969" target="_blank"><img src="http://ws.amazon.com/widgets/q?MarketPlace=US&amp;ServiceVersion=20070822&amp;ID=AsinImage&amp;WS=1&amp;Format=_SL160_&amp;ASIN=B002X3YVCU&amp;tag=jaanjiofaltr-20" alt="Toy Go Round Wheel Cat Exercise Treadmill" /></a><img style="border: medium none ! important; margin: 0px ! important; padding: 0px ! important;" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;l=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969&amp;o=1&amp;a=B002X3YVCU" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" /> </em></span></div>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<ul>
<li><em> </em><a href="http://www.bundascattery.com/catwheels.htm">Bundas Cattery Cat Wheels</a> &#8211; $275</li>
<ul>
<li>Price: okay</li>
<li>Size: too small &#8211; <em><span style="font-size: x-small;">I&#8217;m concerned about the 30&#8243; diameter of the wheel- I feel this is too short for an adult cat to run all out. However, I will email them for further clarification.</span></em></li>
<li><em><span style="font-size: x-small;"> </span></em>Appearance: meh</li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<div style="text-align: left; padding-left: 120px;"><a href="http://www.bundascattery.com/catwheels.htm"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TTe7_cbUJ0I/AAAAAAAAAzY/S09qX_y4wpE/s200/wheeltwosmall.jpg" alt="" width="200" height="195" border="0" /></a></div>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>SOURCES TO MAKE A CAT WHEEL:</li>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://irishrex.20m.com/plans.html">PLANS</a> to build a cat exercise wheel</li>
<ul>
<li><em>Diameter: 52&#8243; or 54&#8243; = really large!  </em></li>
<li><em>In all, these seem like good plans to use as a guide when building a cat wheel. </em></li>
<li><em>No instructions or materials listed.</em></li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left; padding-left: 120px;"><a style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TTfEB6n9-9I/AAAAAAAAAzg/8pZ_PcgFZww/s1600/wheel1.gif"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TTfEB6n9-9I/AAAAAAAAAzg/8pZ_PcgFZww/s200/wheel1.gif" alt="" width="200" height="163" border="0" /></a><em> </em></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><em>  </em></div>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<ul>
<li>A supposed <a href="http://www.freepatentsonline.com/D484284.html">PATENT</a> for a cat wheel</li>
<ul>
<li><em>No instructions or materials listed</em><em> </em></li>
<li><em>PDF containing multiple image views of the wheel</em></li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<ul>
<li>YOUTUBE:</li>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElCVLLBJf7Q">Ringo</a></li>
<ul>
<li>Ability level: Impossible<em> &#8211; requires an advanced engineering degree</em></li>
<li>Instructions: no</li>
<li>Materials: no</li>
</ul>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efciLXP7bsQ">Rogers827</a></li>
<ul>
<li>Ability level: unknown<strong><em> &#8211; this person was kind enough to offer his email if you&#8217;d like to contact him for plans &amp; how-to!</em></strong></li>
<li>Instructions: no</li>
<li>Materials: no</li>
</ul>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xazi3V_diGU">TheMarbellous1</a></li>
<ul>
<li>Ability level: unknown<strong><em> </em></strong></li>
<li>Instructions: no</li>
<li>Materials: no</li>
<li><em>Homemade, but kind of small and unattractive. Works for them, but not for me</em></li>
</ul>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mEtqihF-Fgo">Draco</a></li>
<ul>
<li>Ability level: medium</li>
<li>Instructions: no</li>
<li>Materials: yes</li>
<li><em>More of a hack than a piece of art, and too small for an adult cat. However, the vid does provide materials</em></li>
</ul>
</ul>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f5Fg6KFcOsU&amp;feature=fvw">Cat Wheel by Richard Norton</a></li>
<ul>
<li>Ability level: difficult<strong><em> </em></strong></li>
<li>Instructions: no</li>
<li>Materials: no</li>
<li><em>This one is hooked up to a food-incentive. It also has a wall-attachment instead of a stand</em></li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<ul>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hSkglfpoUJg">The Karakashkats</a></li>
<ul>
<li>Ability level: unknown<strong><em> </em></strong></li>
<li>Instructions: no</li>
<li>Materials: no</li>
<li><em><strong>Owner is willing to sell you the plans for this kitten-size cat wheel, or one that is large enough for adults</strong></em></li>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
</ul>
<p style="text-align: left;"><em> </em><br />
RESULT:</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">With the goal to achieve a proper size-to-function-to-appearance ratio, I&#8217;ll be drawing upon the above elements to plan and build one myself&#8230;</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Based on all this info, what would you do to build one? Post your comments!</p>
<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">Stay tuned for Part 2:</span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">PLANNING</span></div>
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		<title>The Founder Institute: A Volunteer&#8217;s Perspective</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=485</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=485#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 17 Jan 2011 16:31:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[blog]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Networking]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Non-Profit]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=485</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[  Need startup help? Here&#8217;s a great accelerator for startups &#38; entrepreneurs. Have you ever had a great idea but didn&#8217;t know what the hell to do with it? It&#8217;s a fact that many people have ideas, but only real entrepreneurs turn those ideas into business. The Founder Institute may be a great fit for you [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><em>  </em><a style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TSzUrS5xbUI/AAAAAAAAAyE/XdXZnqiBP_A/s1600/logo.png"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TSzUrS5xbUI/AAAAAAAAAyE/XdXZnqiBP_A/s1600/logo.png" alt="" border="0" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">Need startup help? Here&#8217;s a great accelerator for startups &amp; entrepreneurs.<a name="more"></a> Have you ever had a great idea but didn&#8217;t know what the hell to do with it?</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">It&#8217;s a fact that many people have ideas, but only real entrepreneurs turn those ideas into business.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">The <a href="http://www.founderinstitute.com/">Founder Institute</a> may be a great fit for you if you think you have what it takes. Is it easy? Hell no. But its strong &#8220;founder-centric&#8221; philosophy and its sharing of experience and resources lightens the load enough to increase the odds of success for your startup&#8230; IF you graduate.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">Per the Founder Institute Website:</div>
<p><em>The Founder Institute is a technology startup accelerator and entrepreneur training program currently on pace to launch over 500 companies per year in over 13 cities worldwide. The program identifies high-potential entrepreneurs using predictive social science testing, and then guides them through weekly company-building sessions featuring a network of over 350 CEO Mentors. All program stakeholders, including the participating founders and CEO Mentors, share in the equity generated by companies formed in the program. In addition, participants get access to free and discounted services, and are not required to quit their day job.</em></p>
<p>Halfway through my first semester of volunteering for Seattle&#8217;s branch of the Founder Institute, I am impassioned to aid in any way the dynamic and determined entrepreneurs who make up the class. It is inspiring to hear each week from Mentors, battle-hardened founders in their own right, about their own experiences and views on what it means to be an entrepreneur and grow a business.</p>
<p><span style="font-size: large;">i. Passion</span><br />
As a recovering &#8220;desk-jobber&#8221;, it is exhilarating to be swept into the passion that each founder has for his ideas, for the ideas of others, and for life. I learned quickly in my first class that possessing a passion for the world around us is absolutely necessary in order to be successful at our ventures. Without passion, we lose the drive to continue when times get tough; we lose sight of the goal in the face of small- and large- discomforts. There is no option to go into work and tune out, or &#8220;day job&#8221; it; a founder has to be present and engaged on and off the clock. <span style="font-size: large;">Passion and interest in the world is needed to understand how the business will be lasting and meaningful in the context of our global society. </span>Regardless of whether or not you follow the &#8220;proper&#8221; steps to starting a business, you won&#8217;t get anyone on board with your idea if they don&#8217;t experience your infectious passion for it. <em>Having vision is important, but passion is what drives the vision</em>.</p>
<p><span style="font-size: large;">ii. Lifestyle</span><br />
Most of the startup CEO&#8217;s who have mentored the course thus far have founded multiple companies. I get the feeling when they speak that their first companies assumed the role of &#8220;teacher&#8221;, where they experienced the hardships that first tested their commitment to being entrepreneurs. This was where each learned about bad contracts, low funding and board takeover&#8217;s; about lawyers, investors, hiring <em>and</em> firing.</p>
<p>Their presentations give everyone in the room as taste for the hardships suffered and lessons learned. I can see in their eyes the wisdom that comes with constantly learning and evolving from past mistakes. And I also see that their bodies radiate with authenticity and love for the lifestyle. The Founder Institute makes it clear in the first Introductory class that it is OKAY to drop out of the course if we discover that we&#8217;re a wrong fit for the unpredictable lifestyle of an entrepreneur. Whether we graduate from the course or choose to leave, the Institute stresses <span style="font-size: large;">the importance that we be honest with ourselves.</span> There is only room for forward-thinking, great ideas and genuine passion in entrepreneurship.</p>
<p><span style="font-size: large;">iii. Fair</span><br />
In addition to the quality of the course, the economic model of the Founder Institute reflects its overarching philosophy to be <span style="font-size: large;">founder-centric</span>:</p>
<p><em>The Institute keeps costs low, bets on the success of the companies created, and shares in the returns.</em></p>
<ul>
<li><em>First, Founders pay a $50 USD Application Fee to cover the costs of reviewing and testing the prospective entrepreneurs.  </em></li>
<li><em>Next, Founders accepted into the program contribute a $900 USD Course Fee to cover location fees, catering, mentor travel, and other expenses of running a 16 week program. The Course Fee is calculated by dividing costs by the expected number of accepted Founders. </em></li>
<li><em>Third, if a Founder graduates from the program, they are asked to contribute warrants for 3.5% of their company priced at fair market value into a Bonus Pool that is shared between the other Founders, the Mentors, the local operators, and the Institute. 30% of the Bonus Pool returns goes right back to the Founders themselves, allowing each graduate to earn returns based on the success of their peers. </em></li>
<li><em> Lastly, if a company is successful and receives financing from third parties, the Institute asks that the company pay a one time Tuition of $4,500, which supplies the operating capital for the Institute. The success of the Institute is based on the success of the graduates, as it should be. </em></li>
</ul>
<p><strong>Topics Include:</strong></p>
<ul>
<li>Vision &amp; Values</li>
<li>Naming &amp; Branding</li>
<li>Legalities &amp; Incorporation</li>
<li>Hiring, Firing &amp; Cofounders</li>
<li>Revenues, Costs, Profits</li>
<li>Product Development</li>
<li>Intellectual Property</li>
<li>Marketing &amp; Sales</li>
</ul>
<p><em></em><br />
<em>If you have a great entrepreneurial idea, you may want to consider applying to the next semester of the Founder Institute <a href="http://www.founderinstitute.com/join">here</a>!</em></p>
<p><em>And check out <a href="http://www.adeoressi.com/about/">Adeo Ressi</a>, founding member of The Funded and the Founder Institute.</em>
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		<title>So You Want To Leave a Job You Hate</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=484</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=484#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 16 Jan 2011 08:14:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Business]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Creativity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Point of View]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Writing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=484</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A COMMENTARY ON HOW TO APPROACH LIVING YOUR DREAM IN A WAY THAT IS LASTING AND SUSTAINABLE: In an economy that is being called the worst since the Great Depression, I have changed my job. Twice. I felt like I woke up each day to put my life on hold while accepting a bribe to [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><p><a href="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/4327878324_b604872266.jpg"><img class="alignnone size-full wp-image-573" title="4327878324_b604872266" src="http://www.jillyotz.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/4327878324_b604872266-e1329621913577.jpg" alt="" width="583" height="470" /></a></p>
<p><span style="font-size: small;">A COMMENTARY ON HOW TO APPROACH LIVING YOUR DREAM IN A WAY THAT IS LASTING AND SUSTAINABLE:</span></p>
<p>In an economy that is being called the worst since the Great Depression, I have changed my job.</p>
<p>Twice.</p>
<p>I felt like I woke up each day to put my life on hold while accepting a bribe to stare blankly at a computer or to do work at the whim of a supervisor. Holding back my passion and enthusiasm, I lasted a year and a half in my first post-college job, and six months at the second. Intuition told me that I wouldn&#8217;t make it to my six-month anniversary in the another desk job, so I finally chose to follow the whispers of longing in my heart. I have become almost more familiar with the fear of change as well as the terror of having no idea what lies ahead than I am with a steady paycheck.</p>
<p><img style="border: medium none ! important; margin: 0px ! important; padding: 0px ! important;" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;l=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969&amp;o=1&amp;a=158008270X" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" />Speaking from experience, if you want to leave a job you hate I suggest you make a game plan and write it down.</p>
<p>Now throw the plan away.</p>
<p>In the short term it may not be possible to make a career change, and there are a number of ways that you can start enjoying yourself more at work while you plan for the inevitable job and/or career change. I highly recommend the blog post, <a href="http://www.theundercoverrecruiter.com/content/12-kickass-ways-love-your-job-and-life">&#8220;12 Kickass Ways To Love Your Job and Your Life&#8221;</a>, written by social entrepreneur, Arvind Devalia, which offers solutions and provides perspective to bring more joy to your current situation.</p>
<p>Or to at least make the misery not quite so bad.</p>
<p>For regardless of how much you read, plan and consult, happiness is not likely to align with your chronological, biological, professional, and societal agendas. It might not align with your fiscal agenda either, but by the time you are happy you may find the other agendas less pressing. There is overwhelming scientific and anecdotal evidence that fame and fortune contribute to happiness only to a point. Your salary affords you your basic needs, and that last promotion bought you your dream house, but thanks to the Law of Diminishing Returns, your quality of life increases per dollar earned at a steadily decreasing rate. Eventually, even as you earn more and more money, your happiness stops increasing at all. You apply yourself more and become more disciplined; <em>I just need to earn a little bit more to buy x and y, and THEN I&#8217;ll be fulfilled,</em> you say.<em> </em> But at this zero-happiness-increase point you still feel something is missing because the new purchases only fill the void momentarily.</p>
<div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; text-align: left;"><em><span style="font-size: small;">As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being. </span></em><span style="font-size: x-small;"><em>- </em></span><span style="font-size: x-small;">Carl Jung</span></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; text-align: left;">The truth is, something <em>is</em> missing.  The billions and trillions of dollars in the world were unsuccessful in bringing satiety, even temporarily, to the enormous emptiness that lies inside you. It is okay to choose to be distracted from the emptiness for the rest of your life by shiny new gadgets surrounding us, for in the face of familiarity and knowing, daunting is the darkness and turmoil of not knowing what lies ahead and relying solely on the enormous space within you.</div>
<p>But I am here to tell you, <em>do not fear the emptiness. </em>This is were the first inklings of true success start to grow, for creation is only formed out of this rich, dark emptiness. The blog <a href="http://zenhabits.net/">Zen Habits</a> writes about<br />
<a href="http://zenhabits.net/creative-habit/">The No. 1 Habit of Highly Creative People</a>by questioning known creatives about the habits that they consider important to their creativity. The habit that stood out the most was the need for solitude. Creativity needs to have space to flourish where there is no threat of cell phones, traffic lights, or holiday sales to momentarily distract. Chock full of mental calculations and physical reactions, a logical plan keeps the mind in charge, but the unknown- having no plan at all- forces the mind to let go; emotions rise in a space where there is no logical analysis to quench them, where a passionate fire awaits to spark the genius.</p>
<div style="text-align: left;"><em><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: small;">The creation of something new is not accomplished by the intellect but by the play instinct acting from inner necessity. The creative mind plays with the objects it loves.</span></em><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"> -Carl Jung</span></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">In my last job, I experienced overwhelming feelings of frustration and betrayal; fear and anger grew as I felt the time for change grow nearer. It took me long months of staying indoors and avoiding the mirror before I learned to appreciate my anger instead of to suppress it. And then, armed with my passion but faced with an unknown future, I felt lost. I am still learning to embrace feeling blind and lost. In my efforts to overcome the feelings of failure and fear, I can see that I&#8217;ve been trying to force the creative Me out in the same manner that I would pop a zit.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><a style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;" href="http://www.amazon.com/This-Time-Dance-Creating-Work/dp/1585425273?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;link_code=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969" target="_blank"><img src="http://ws.amazon.com/widgets/q?MarketPlace=US&amp;ServiceVersion=20070822&amp;ID=AsinImage&amp;WS=1&amp;Format=_SL160_&amp;ASIN=1585425273&amp;tag=jaanjiofaltr-20" alt="This Time I Dance!: Creating the Work You Love" /></a><img style="border: medium none ! important; margin: 0px ! important; padding: 0px ! important;" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;l=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969&amp;o=1&amp;a=1585425273" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" /><a href="http://www.awakeningartistry.com/index.php">Tama Kieves</a>, author and speaker, says about creativity, &#8220;<em>Your relationship with yourself determines the <img style="border: medium none ! important; margin: 0px ! important; padding: 0px ! important;" src="http://www.assoc-amazon.com/e/ir?t=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;l=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969&amp;o=1&amp;a=B001WAHKPU" alt="" width="1" height="1" border="0" />quality of love and joy that shines in your work. Severity will cause creativity to flee; you must live in your joy for creativity to thrive- through compassion and self-care.&#8221;</em></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">Self-kindness and respect will do more good than the negative alternatives. It is of utmost importance that the agenda for happiness be the highest priority instead of the lowest one. Eventually, I will stop crying and throwing my tantrums of hopelessness and rage, screaming at the unfairness of it all. Eventually I will tire and finally relax into the fear/anger/sadness, and then that too will pass. Anger is only an emotion; it is not bad or good. When unleashed in the spirit of compassion, the anger provides a fire for creation. It provides a spark in the darkness where fear and guilt have no place.</div>
<p>To summarize:</p>
<ul>
<li>Ultimately, fulfillment comes from creating, not from regurgitating and manipulating</li>
<li>Creativity needs space to grow</li>
<li>It needs passion to ignite</li>
<li>It needs nurturing through compassion and self-care.</li>
</ul>
<p>Dreams, intuition, imagination and creativity are the pathways to understanding the chaos and embracing it. Transcribed through <a href="http://tomkenyon.com/">Tom Kenyon</a>, the Hathors say that &#8220;following your deepest sense of joy will lead you to be in the places where you will most likely survive&#8221;. Your passion will always light the way. It doesn&#8217;t matter that you cannot see what lies ahead. Nurture yourself and you nurture your dreams.</p>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><em style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">But never lose sight of the fact that you are the creator of your life, and you can re-create it at any moment, regardless of the circumstances.<span style="font-size: x-small;"> -The Hathors</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">This post is featured on <a href="http://www.theundercoverrecruiter.com/content/so-you-want-leave-job-you-hate">The Undercover Recruiter</a></span></div>
<p><em style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">  </span></em>
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		<title>On Apologizing</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=483</link>
		<comments>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=483#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 14 Jan 2011 19:22:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
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		<description><![CDATA[WHAT IT IS &#38; WHY IT&#8217;S IMPORTANT In some families, please is described as the magic word.  In our house, however, it was sorry.  ~Margaret Laurence &#160; While watching ABC’s Castle the other night I was struck by a short conversation the main character had with his daughter. She expressed in exasperation how all she [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: large;">WHAT IT IS &amp; WHY IT&#8217;S IMPORTANT </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><em>In some families, </em>please<em> is described as the magic word.  In our house, however, it was </em>sorry<em>.  ~Margaret Laurence</em></div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><span style="font-size: small;">While watching ABC’s <em>Castle</em></span><span style="font-size: small; font-style: normal;"> the other night I was struck by a short conversation the main character had with his daughter. She expressed in exasperation how all she wants from her boyfriend is an apology without excuses, facts or justifications.</span></p>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I reflected on past events, words and actions that I was having a hard time letting go of so that I could move forward with my life. I realized that I wanted, simply and only, an apology like the character wanted in <em>Castle</em></span><span style="font-size: small; font-style: normal;">. I&#8217;ve found that apologizing is an intuitive desire that, although invisible, is still widely acknowledged in entertainment, in politics, in science, and in literature. How could something so powerful be denied?</span></div>
<h3 class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>WHY APOLOGIZE </strong></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I have never heard my mother say “I’m sorry”. With a master’s degree in psychology, my mother pretends to understand how everybody’s mind works. I just wish that she wouldn’t brush over the importance of how peoples’ hearts work. I feel like an apology from her, without excuses, justifications, and reasoning, would clear a block inside me and let my heart, and mind, move on.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><em>So what is an apology and why does it feel so important to have one?</em></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Professor Jennifer Gerarda Brown, Director for the Center on Dispute Resolution, says that, whether in an emotional or a legal context, there is more to an apology than simply the words. “</span><span style="font-size: small;">It is important to think about purposes, because the effectiveness of an</span><span style="font-size: small;">apology can only be measured with reference to its goals.” (Brown, &#8220;The Role of Apology In Negotiation&#8221;, </span><span style="font-size: small;"><em>MARQUETTE LAW REVIEW)</em></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Regardless of eloquent turns of phrase, people k<em>now</em></span><span style="font-size: small;"> when an apology is self-serving or forced. Without authenticity behind the “I’m sorry”, the effectiveness from the view of the person receiving the apology is low or none. &#8220;Almost everyone seems to agree that an apology should be the result of some analysis and introspection on the part of the offender-if it comes too spontaneously or off-the-cuff it loses power and legitimacy. This can create a tension.” (Brown)</span></p>
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<div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; text-align: left;"><em>A stiff apology is a second insult&#8230; The injured party does not want to be compensated because he has been wronged; he wants to be healed because he has been hurt. </em>~G.K. Chesterton</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Yesterday, my mother said “I apologize…” I could feel my heart leap to my throat and I leaned forward to drink in the elixer of the next words. Unfortunately, the next words were just sand and dust to my parched heart: “I apologize… for all the times I will say [hurtful thing] in the future”. There was no genuine apology in her statement; if she were sorry, why would she plan on continuing to hurt me with those words? She went on to explain that I cannot control and manipulate what she says. In other words, she justified her behavior. </span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">My heart felt like it had just been ground into the dirt.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> I know that she may have been trying to explain herself. I know that she could have been trying to understand me better. But I also know her. And I know that I have never heard her say or intend to say &#8220;I&#8217;m sorry&#8221;. &#8220;I&#8217;m sorry but&#8230;&#8221; just isn&#8217;t enough.</span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Times-Roman; font-size: small;">Intuitively I know that healing can begin with a simple apology. Perhaps this is the reason for wanting one so badly. Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas, authors of <em>The Five Languages of Apology</em></span><span style="font-family: Times-Roman;"><span style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif; font-size: small;"> (2006), confirm that a person can experience healing in all relationships through apology. They, as well as numerous other authors and scientists, agree that there are many ways to apologize and to be authentic to oneself at the same time. The apology “languages” according to these authors are:</span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;" href="http://www.amazon.com/Five-Languages-Apology-Experience-Relationships/dp/1881273792?ie=UTF8&amp;tag=jaanjiofaltr-20&amp;link_code=bil&amp;camp=213689&amp;creative=392969" target="_blank"><img src="http://ws.amazon.com/widgets/q?MarketPlace=US&amp;ServiceVersion=20070822&amp;ID=AsinImage&amp;WS=1&amp;Format=_SL160_&amp;ASIN=1881273792&amp;tag=jaanjiofaltr-20" alt="The Five Languages of Apology: How to Experience Healing in all Your Relationships" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">1)<span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">    </span> Expressing Regret: <em>I’m sorry</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">2)<span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">    </span> Accepting Responsibility: <em>I was wrong</em><em></em></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">3)<span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">    </span> Making Restitution: <em>What can I do to make it right?</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">4)<span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">    </span> Genuinely Repenting: <em>I’ll try not to do that again.</em></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 0.5in; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">5)<span style="font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;">    </span></span><span style="font-family: Times-Roman; font-size: 11pt;"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: x-small;"> Requesting Forgiveness: </span><em><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">Will you please forgive me?</span></em></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">In looking at the above list, I realize that I want to hear simply two out of the five for my own healing to begin:<em> I’m sorry </em></span><span style="font-size: small;">and<em> I’ll try not to do that again.</em></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Jim Kling from Medscape Medical News wrote about the Society of Behavioral Medicine’s 31st Annual Meeting and Scientific Sessions, which presented research that shows that apologies are not just about our intangible emotions; they have physiological responses and effects. The type of healing that I seek is not invisible to our eyes, our science, or our intuition. An apology doesn&#8217;t have to mean admitting you were wrong or that you need to fix the situation. It doesn&#8217;t mean that you have to ask for forgiveness. But it <em>does </em>mean liberation, opening doors, healing, regained trust and a stronger relationship.</span></div>
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<div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; text-align: left;"><em><span style="font-size: small;"> </span>An apology is the superglue of life.  It can repair just about anything.  </em>~Lynn Johnston</div>
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<h3 class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>FORGIVENESS</strong></span></h3>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Chapman and Thomas asked if it was possible to forgive without first receiving an apology. Their conclusion is that <em>forgiveness </em>is a &#8220;two-person transaction&#8221; that is first enabled by apologizing. Forgiveness is not possible without an apology. The provide a fascinating western religious example: </span></div>
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<div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">&#8220;Some, particularly within the Christian worldview, have taught forgiveness without an apology. They often quote the words of Jesus, &#8216;If you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.&#8217; [...] Such an interpretation of Jesus&#8217; teachings fails to reckon with the rest of the scriptural teachings on forgiveness. The Christian is instructed to forgive others in the manner that God forgives us. How does God forgive us? The Scriptures say that if we confess our sins, God will forgive our sins. Nothing in the Old or New Testaments indicates that God forgives the sins of people who do not confess and repent of their sins. When the pastor encourages the wife to forgive the erring husband while he still continues his [adulterous affair], the minister is requiring of the wife something that God Himself does not do.&#8221;</span></div>
<p><span style="font-size: small;">If the act of forgiveness is Divine, and apology is an act of confession and a catalyst to forgiveness, then apologizing is Devine as well. </span><span style="font-size: small;">In my view, the point of an apology is to open the possibility of healing. </span><span style="font-size: small;">Where asking for forgiveness occurs after someone asks for forgiveness and implies that he will try to change his future actions, saying &#8220;I&#8217;m sorry&#8221;</span><span style="font-size: small;"> means that they acknowledge your hurt, their participation in it, and their remorse for participating. </span><span style="font-size: small;">There is no shame in feeling remorse and voicing this to the people affected.</span></p>
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<h3 class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><strong>TO THE APOLOGIZE-ER:</strong></span><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Times,'Times New Roman',serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Professor Brown cites Ken Blanchard and Margret McBride when presenting a structure for an apology. I&#8217;m posting them because I find them pretty useful for self-reflection:</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-size: small;">What mistakes did I make?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Did I dismiss another person, their wishes, feelings, or ideas?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Did I take credit when it was not due?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Why did I do this?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Was it an impulsive, thoughtless act?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Was it calculated?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Was it a result of my fear, anger, or frustration?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">What was my motivation?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">How long have I let this go on? Is this the first or repeated time? Is</span><span style="font-size: small;">this behavior becoming a pattern in my life?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">What is the truth I am not dealing with?</span></li>
<li style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;">Am I better than this behavior? </span></li>
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<div style="text-align: left;"><em>True remorse is never just a regret over consequence; it is a regret over motive.  ~Mignon McLaughlin<span style="font-size: x-small;">, The Neurotic&#8217;s Notebook, 1960</span></em><span style="font-size: x-small;">  </span></div>
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<p><span style="font-size: small;">Saying “I’m sorry” takes awareness, integrity and courage. When I apologize after an argument or for something that I’m ashamed of, I often feel like an animal exposing the delicate skin of my underbelly to the hunter with a knife. But when my cat shows me her belly, and the horses I work with touch me with their delicate, velvety noses, I know that they allow me to be close because they trust. Trusting in the relationship and in myself is what gives me the power to apologize when I mess up. And for my part, </span><span style="font-size: small;">I can trace so much of my teenage anger, rage and hurt to a moment where all I needed was &#8220;I&#8217;m sorry&#8221;.  </span><span style="font-size: small;">Genuine apology opens the door to forgiveness and reconciliation, removing the barrier created by the “offense” and enabling for regained trust over time.</span><span style="font-size: small;"> This is such an important element if you value your relationships. </span></p>
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		<title>Great Gorm Guitar Rack</title>
		<link>http://www.jillyotz.com/?p=482</link>
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		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jan 2011 02:24:00 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[FROM ONE OF MY FAVORITE BLOGS During my regular peruse of Ikea Hacker, I came across this wonderful DIY guitar stand made from the Gorm shelves and wine rack. &#160; &#160; Unfortunately, the specific instructions aren&#8217;t in English. But the pictures should suffice.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p></p><div style="text-align: center;">FROM ONE OF MY FAVORITE BLOGS</div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">During my regular peruse of <a href="http://www.ikeahackers.net/">Ikea Hacker</a>, I came across this wonderful <a href="http://www.ikeahackers.net/2011/01/gorm-guitar-shelf.html">DIY guitar stand</a> made from the Gorm shelves and wine rack.</div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TS5hbuiKP1I/AAAAAAAAAy4/1Z56uFnFqBI/s1600/%2525E7%252585%2525A7%2525E7%252589%252587%252B475.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_kO7OhIpneLM/TS5hbuiKP1I/AAAAAAAAAy4/1Z56uFnFqBI/s200/%2525E7%252585%2525A7%2525E7%252589%252587%252B475.jpg" width="150" />&nbsp;</a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">&nbsp; </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">Unfortunately, the <a href="http://herguitarcraft.blogspot.com/2008/07/ikea.html">specific instructions</a> aren&#8217;t in English. But the pictures should suffice.</div>
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